Baseball Dept.

 +1235

95

Greatest Closer of All-Time

Career: In jeopardy

Theme: Enter Sandman

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Rivera

 +982

125

#42

Position: Second Base

Team: Brooklyn Dodgers

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Robinson

 +778

167

David Wright

moc    

New York Mets 3rd Baseman

One of the few non-hispanic Mets left

In my living room: David Wright's dirty hot tub filter

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 +711

192

Joe DiMaggio

moc    

The Yankee Clipper

Hit streak: 56 games

New York, NY

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 +709

194

Babe Ruth

moc    

The Bambino

Hot dogs per game: 2

Career HRs: 714

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Ruth

 +477

243

Johnny Bench

moc    

Leader of the Big Red Machine

MLB Greatest Catcher

MVP 1970 & 1972

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Bench

 +432

250

Sandy Koufax

moc    

Legendary Dodgers Pitcher

But not on the High Holidays.

Made the Dodgers the choice of the Chosen People.

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Koufax

 +331

272

Nolan Ryan

moc    

The Ryan Express

No-hitters: 7

Signature Moment: The Ventura Noogie

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Ryan

 +281

297

Lou Gehrig

moc    

The Iron Horse

Consecutive games streak: 2,130

Alternate nickname: Biscuit Pants

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Gehrig

 +253

310

Mr. October

Consecutive World Series HRs: 3

Career teams: 4

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Jackson

 +244

317

Ted Williams

moc    

The Splendid Splinter

Career BA: .344

Military service: 4 years

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Williams

 +112

375

Red Sox Legend

Last American league Triple Crown, 1967: .326 BA

Nickname: Yaz

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 +60

432

Joe Mauer

moc    

Catcher - Minnesota Twins

AL Batting Champ 2006

AL Sideburns Champ 2004-2006

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Mauer

 +56

449

Bucky Dent

moc    

Bucky F***ing Dent

Carl Yazstremski knees buckled: 2

Bronx, NY

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 +50

469

John Rocker

moc    

Reliever/Bigot

Career saves: 88

Career slurs: 136

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 +47

497

Cincinnati Reds Outfielder

Nicknames: The Natural, The Kid, Junior

Should have been the all-time Home Run King

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 +47

498

Minnesota Twins First Baseman

2006 AL MVP

Puts up numbers mor-than-you-neau

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 +45

507

Sean Casey

moc    

The Mayor

Current team: Detroit Tigers

College: University of Richmond

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Casey

 +45

508

Red Sox Ace

Sock: Bloody

Persona: Drama queen

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Schilling

 +44

522

The Big Unit

Perfect games: 1

Unit size: Diminishing

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Johnson

 +44

528

Seattle Mariners Starting Pitcher

Future Cy Young winner

Nickname: King Felix

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Hernandez

 +41

540

Ichiro Suzuki

moc    

Mariners Leadoff Man

Swing: Pendulum

Prefecture: Aichi

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 +31

604

Bob Uecker

moc    

Mr. Baseball

Position: Catcher

Location: Jusssssst a bit outside

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 +30

613

Ryan Howard

moc    

Phillies First Baseman

Hobbies: Dingers to left, right, and center

Turn-offs: Intentional walks, shaving cream pies

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Howard

 +13

682

Bern, Baby, Bern

Album: The Journey Within

Lookalike: Arthur

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Williams

 +12

786

Fading Star

Legacy: Moderately tarnished

Bad habits: Numerous

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Rodriguez

 +12

799

El Duque

moc    

Lanzador Cubano

Edad: Entre 35-45 anos

Equipo: Los Mets

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 +10

847

Mr Met

moc    

Heady Metropolitans Mascot

Age: 43

Sexual preference: Ambiguous

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Met

 +5

881

Donnie Baseball

New York, NY

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Mattingly

 +5

888

Father of Baseball reporting

Survivor of brain aneurysm

62 year-old indie rock guitarist

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 +2

900

He is Keith Hernandez

Off-Color Comments: 1

Needs help moving.

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 +2

904

Astros 1B

Nickname: Big Puma

The fear of Cincinnati Reds fans everywhere

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Berkman

 +1

909

Derek Jeter

moc    

Yankee Great

Doubles power: Waning

Double chin: Waxing

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Jeter

 +1

915

Overweight Ace

Undeserved Cy Youngs: 1

Career Teams: 4

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Colon

 +1

941

MLB Relief Pitcher

Current team: Atlanta Braves

Nickname: Octavio "Don't Ask" Dotel

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 +1

947

Ty Cobb

moc    

The Georgia Peach

Hall of Fame Tiger - 4,189 hits.

Once attacked a heckler who had no hands.

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 0

959

Outfielder, Porn Collector

Emotions: None

Hat fall-off frequency: 97%

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 0

960

Barry Bonds

moc    

Retired Slugger

Homeruns: 7**

Preferred ointments: The Cream, The Clear

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Bonds

 0

961

David Ortiz

moc    

Big Papi

Yankee Killer

Diets undertaken: None

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 0

962

Powerless Catcher

Horrific Injuries: 1

Worst offensive player in the MLB

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 0

964

Taiwanese Sinkerballer

Days in need of haircut: 956

GB- FB ratio: 1,253:14

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 0

965

"El Lechero"

Hobby: Delivering

Got Melky?

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 0

966

NY Yankees 2nd baseman

Inexplicably slow-footed

Bronx, NY

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 0

969

Johnny Damon

moc    

Johnny Baseball

Arm strength: Lacking

New York, NY

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 0

970

Carl Pavano

moc    

Bad Investment

Ailments: Elbow, knee, back, bruised ass

Location: 60 Day DL

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 0

973

Joe Morgan

moc    

Captain Obvious

Playing reputation: Star

Announcing reputation: Not star

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 0

978

Jason Giambi

moc    

The Sultan of Shots

Chance still on steroids: 78%

Hairstyle: Shameless grease-back

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 0

983

Jason Bay

moc    

Pittsburgh Pirates Outfielder

Hobbies: Striking out, streaky hitting

2004 NL Rookie of the Year

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 0

985

Pittsburgh Pirates Legend

Gold Gloves: 5

Bat Type: Alka Seltzer

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 0

992

New York Yankees Phenom

Current level: MLB

Fastball: 94 mph

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Hughes

 0

993

Anaheim Angels 2B

Current level: Major Leagues

Tools: 4

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Kendrick

 0

994

Mike Mussina

moc    

Moose

College: Stanford

20-win seasons: 0

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Mussina

 0

999

Von Hayes

moc    

1980's Phillies Star

Once traded for: Julio Franco

Middle name: Francis

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Hayes

 0

Jake Peavy

moc    

San Diego Padres Ace

Pet Peeve: Not packing a lip

Career K/9: 8.82

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Peavy

 0

The Rocket

Cy Youngs: 7

Career Ks: 4502

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Clemens

 0

Man-Ram

Hairstyle: Dominican Dreads

Enjoys: Being himself

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Ramirez

 0

Doc Gooden

moc    

Dr. K

Prognosis: Incarceration

Cy Youngs: 1

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Gooden

 0

D-Train

2003 NL Rookie of the Year

World Series titles: 1

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Willis

 0

Matt Nokes

moc    

Early '90s Yankees Catcher

Career span: 10 seasons

Middle name: Dodge

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 0

Pete Rose

moc    

Charlie Hustle

Career hits: 4,191

Favorite song: "The Gambler"

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 0

Mark McGwire

moc    

'Roid Monger

Lives in the present

Hall of Fame chances: Waning

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop McGwire

 0

JP Ricciardi

moc    

Sabermetric Monster

Dubious trader, signer

Number-crunching tool: Sledgehammer

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Ricciardi

 0

Andre Dawson

moc    

The Hawk

One of six all-time in 300 HR-300 SB club

Occupation: Trying to make Hall of Fame

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 0

Travis Hafner

moc    

Pronk

Likes: WWE, OPS, hitting grand slams

Dislikes: Mark Buehrle, elbow injuries

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 0

Carlos Zambrano

moc    

Chicago Cubs Ace

Big Z

Carpal tunnel cause: Too much internet

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 0

Julio Franco

moc    

Ageless First Baseman

Models image after: Cigar store Indian

His major league career is old enough to drink

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 0

Sam Horn

moc    

His name is Sam Horn

He once struck out

He was a legend in '87

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 0

Kenny Rogers

moc    

Major League Slopthrower

Current team: Detroit Tigers

Controversy: "Dirtgate" 2006

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Rogers

 0

Bobby Valentine

moc    

Former Met manager

Master of Disguise

Least Favorite Pitcher: Kenny Rogers

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 0

Nick Johnson

moc    

OBP Jesus

Is a mammal

Flips out and gets on base

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 0

Johan Santana

moc    

Mr. Cy Young

Unhittable changeup

Venezulean kneebuckler

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 0

Jim Callis

moc    

Writer for Baseball America

Prospect Guru

A hero for nerds and fantasy buffs everywhere

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 0

Omar Vizquel

moc    

Major League Shortstop

Eleven gold gloves since 1993

Highest fielding percentage SS in ML history

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 0

Red Ruffing

moc    

New York Yankees Hall of Fame Pitcher

Six-time World Series champion

Total toes: 6

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 0

Ghost Man

moc    

Master of the Basepaths

Never takes the extra bag

Currently on 1st and 2nd

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 0

Cole Hamels

moc    

Philadelphia Phillies Starting Pitcher

Best change-up in the Major Leagues

Chief Export: Ks

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 0

Florida Marlins Shortstop

Nickname: Han-Ram

Pure power and speed

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Ramirez

 0

Cleveland Indians Centerfielder

Burgeoning Superstud

Arguably MLB's #1 Mancrush

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Sizemore

 0

Aaron Harang

moc    

Cincinnati Reds Starting Pitcher

Good fastball, better goatee

Prone to giving long-winded speeches

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Harang

 0

David Gonos

moc    

Baseball Writer for CBS Sportsline

Known for his sage-like fantasy wisdom

Enjoys letting the prospect cat out of the bag

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Gonos

 0

Keith Law

moc    

ESPN Baseball Personality

Prospect cynic

Nickname: KLAW

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Law

 0

Tampa Bay Outfielder

Fastest man in the major leagues

Runs like he's struggling to stay afloat

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Crawford

 0

St. Louis Cardinals Catcher

Best defensive catcher in baseball.

Game winning HR in game 7 of 2006 NLCS

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Molina

 0

Yankee Phenom

One of the few MLB Native Americans

2005 Big 12 Newcomer Pitcher of the Year

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Chamberlain

 0

Ian Kennedy

moc    

Yankees Phenom

2006 First-round draft pick

He's all ears.

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 0

Venezuelan Baseballer

Nickname: The Big Cat

Career HRs: 399

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop Galarraga

 0

Shortstop for the Texas Rangers

200 hits 5 straght seasons, batting title in 2005

At least he's not Jeter

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 0

Former trainer, 'roid monger

Injected many a famous major league buttocks

Avid collector of used syringes and gauzepads

Comments |  Stats |  Wikipedia  | Shop McNamee

 0

Tony Eusebio

moc    

Clutch Baseballer

Stature: Portly

Outhit Killer B's in Playoffs

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